Being Held by Nature

The City of Ashland, Oregon is located on land that was inhabited by Native American tribal people until 150 years ago when the Takelma and other Native Amercians were paraded off their lands of origin. Agnes Baker Pilgrim, aka Grandma Aggie, a member of the 13 Indigenous Grandmothers Council, is the oldest living female member of the Takelma tribe. According to Grandma Aggie, the mole is a sacred animal to the Takelma because it brings the darkness up to the light as it burrows through the soil.

I am reminded of this process of bringing the light to bear upon the darkness in just about every aspect of my life these days. In the pursuit of spiritual awakening there is a distinct relationship between the darkness and the light. As we grow in spirit we are growing in light. As we grow in light, we are able to peer more deeply into our own shadow aspects. Shadow is simply that which has not yet had the light shone upon it. So it stands to reason that during the process of our own growth we will continually become aware of things that were not quite recognizable before.

There are times in my own journey of self discovery when I have become aware of certain behaviors or assumptions of mine that I am very happy to find out about and I feel great joy and a deep relief. There are also times when I have felt absolutely terrible to discover that I have been participating in something less than wholesome without conscious awareness. During those times, in the presence of feelings of dread, guilt, shame or self-loathing, it can be difficult to find my way back to the light. It was this very circumstance that the forest spoke to me about during a recent walk through the woods.

Nature spoke to me about its willingness to hold me regardless of what opinion I was holding of myself. I was assured through its presence that it, Nature, did not hold me in judgment. Nature held me with complete acceptance of my being and my journey through life. I began to contemplate my experience with Nature, knowing that I am part of it. I and Nature are one. We are of the same components. We coexist upon the earth. With the earth we are, in fact, a single organism. How, then, can I hold judgments about myself that are not reflected in the greater perspective of Nature?

Once again I began to experience the transformative power of light penetrating the darkness within my being. I noticed the rich soil beneath my feet. In mid-winter beneath rain and melting snow and fallen leaves, the earth was undergoing the process of darkness returning to the soil to make way for the returning light of spring. As I breathed in the air around me, I intentionally released the heavy energy of the darkness within me and accepted the light that Nature holds for each of us in our journey. The forest and the trees are such potent representatives of nature’s beauty. But so am I, and each one of God’s creations. Can we learn to look upon ourselves in the same manner that we look upon a tree? Consider how the tree looks upon us. We are held in acceptance. May we continue to learn to hold ourselves and all others in this way.